|
|
The first 10 weeks I was in Moldova, I stayed with a host family during my training period called PST. In this family I had a mom (Elena) dad (Stefan) a 20 year-old sister (Valea) a 17 year-old brother (Vasile) and a 14 year-old brother (Andre). My sister Valea was egaged to her boyfriend, Ion. Last weekend, I went back to visit my PST host family and to attend the wedding.
I left my current site on Friday afternoon. I took with me some homemade American style chocolate chip cookies. They eaten so fast, I don’t think my sister actually got one. I also took with me a CD of photos from when I lived with them, and one photo in a frame of the entire family (me included).
Just like how all “All Roads Lead to Rome”, in Moldova, all roads lead to Chisinau. Even though my PST village is closer to my current town than it is to Chisinau, I still had to travel through the capital to get to it. So, I took a rutiera (think conversion van) to Chisinau, a trolley-car into the main part of town. Next, I walked to the autogara (bus/ruteria station). Then I got on a ruteria to Orhei, and asked them to stop when we passed through my village.
Once I got off the ruteria, I called my PST host dad “Tata Stefan” and told him I was there and he came and picked me up in the car. (This is highly unusual…we normally walk the 30 minutes to the house, but I guess with getting ready for the wedding and all, they wanted people to get to the house quickly). I got in the car and gave Tata Stefan a big hug. In the backseat was my cousin George (he’s in 3rd grade and is studying English). I said hello to him and he said “AWESOME”. (yeah, I taught him that!).
Once at the house, I got out of the car and was attacked by my sister Valea. She hugged me so tight, I couldn’t breath…and she didn’t let go for a good minute and a half. Then my brother Andre (14) gave me a big hug. OMG – he had grown at least 3 inches since I left 6 weeks prior. Next, Mama Elena came out of the house and gave me a big hug too. After a bit, she took a step, ‘copped-a-feel’ on me and said I’ve lost so much weight. She also said ‘Colleen, your boobs used to be so big. What happened?’. HAHA.
My brother Vasile wasn’t at the house yet. He was working in Chisinau and wouldn’t be coming in until the morning. Then I walked through the house saying hello to everyone…mostly aunts, cousins, grandmas, random neighbors. Everyone was busy. They were busy making food for the wedding the next day.
If you are interested in seeing some of the video from this night, feel free to go to my YouTube and check them out:
After saying hello to everyone, I went into the cellar where more food prep was being done, and ate some food. Then I helped make Moldovan ‘meatballs’. (see the video). It was great to be able to joke around with my family again. My host brother Andre and I got into a bit of a flour fight at the end (but not too much b/c there were adults there…although they were laughing).
That night, after most of the relatives/food prep helpers left to their respective houses, I asked if I might take a bath. I figured I would have to ‘bucket bathe’ b/c there is no shower and no running water in the bathroom, however I didn’t realize WHERE I would have to take my bath. The bathroom was being used as a pantry for food b/c there were so many people at the house, it was one of the only ‘out-of-the-way’ spots. So, I had to take a bath in my bedroom. I heated the water up on the stove, poured it into a plastic bucket, took it into my room and took a bath there. Now, this IS much more difficult that it sounds. The bucket was not large enough for me to put my foot in and stand up (much less 2 feet). My bedroom (an isolated room that was mine when I lived there) is completely carpeted. It was cold and people were constantly walking by the windows outside and they were still working. You can only imagine how tough this was!
The next morning, I helped load ‘stuff’ into Tata Stefan’s car. OMG – I can’t tell you how much water and pop they bought. I counted at least 20 containers of a dozen 2 liters of water. There were respectable numbers of bottles of each kind of pop (at least 4 varieties). All of it was in the cellar and we had to walk it out to the car. Then there was the alcohol…champagne (the best kind in Moldova), Vodka, Conac, and wine!!! I have no idea how much of any of these were bought, but one car load (VW Jetta) was full of just Champagne.
While we were loading ‘stuff’, my 18-year-old brother Vasile arrived home from Chisinau. He was walking up the drive-way, and I ran down to give him a big hug. Then something happened that I don’t normally let happen (b/c I’m a big girl) he picked me up off the ground and swung me around. Gosh I missed this family…probably more than my family back home….just kidding…but only slightly…lol.
Around 10:30, Tata Stefan drove my sister Valea and I to the highway so we could catch a ruteria to Orhei (the rayon center, and a much larger town). Unfortunately, there were no ruterias to be found…so we hitch-hiked to Orhei. There, we went to a salon to get our hair done (and Valea got her nails done too). It was great, like being back in America. There was even a TV playing music videos…however most of them were in Russian…but at least every 5 videos was an American band. Man they love pop, hip-hop and rap here! (Which, incase you are wondering, rapping in Russian does not sound ‘hard’…is sounds like Russian…I’m more afraid of the Russian mafia than Russian rappers).
When we were done at the salon, Tata Stefan picked us up at the salon in Orhei b/c he needed to pick up cakes for the wedding from a bakery there. We dropped the cakes off at the reception hall. I couldn’t believe it…even more people where there making food!!! All the people from the night before, plus many others were there. They were sitting along a long table making one dish at a time. Then they would go and place that dish on all the tables and start on another one. I’m so happy I was able to see how this happens…makes you really appreciate the food much more…and makes you realize why we use cateriers!
Back at the house, people were gathering. I helped my sister get into her dress. She had lost about 5 kilos (11 pounds) and the dress was much larger than when they bought it, so it had to be cinched more than expected. I got dressed and put ‘my face’ (make-up) on. My aunt was there too with her newborn baby. Since I was already dressed I picked up the baby so others could get ready. Then, Valea’s husband-to-be, Ion, said “Wow Colleen, you look so natural and pretty with a baby in your arms…do you want one? Lets take a photo of you holding a baby and send it to Mark (my bf back home, in case you didn’t know) so he can see.” Gosh – thanks Ion…
We finally left to go to the reception hall at 6:00 pm. I thought this was a bit early, but they had to take professional photos of Valea and Ion. Well, I figured that around 7 or 8 pm people would start showing up…nope. People didn’t start appearing until 9:30. They have a different way of organizing their weddings. Let me show you…
- The bride and groom and their 2 assistants stand behind a receiving table. On the table is bread and wine. - As people enter the wedding, they form a line and walk up to the table. At the table they may present gifts or some small money. Then the bride and groom give the guest a glass of wine and the guest gives a speech (man…they LOVE speeches here)- When there are no ‘new’ guests, people dance in the center of the floor. The normal dance is the HORA. (very traditional in eastern Europe). You hold hands and dance around in a circle. - If you are a relative of the bride or groom, you get a towel tied around your right elbow. I was unable to get an explanation as to where this tradition came from (not even from the wonderful English speaking friend of Valea’s). - If you helped preparing for the wedding, you get a flower to wear. (they were fake flowers…as was Valea’s bouquet)- The last guests to arrive are the NANASI. (pronounced: na-nash). This married couple is the ‘godparents’ of the new married couple. They will be their counselors and life-long friends. Frequently, the Nanasi are family (this pair is Ion – the grooms – older sister and her husband) or close friends.- The Nanasi receive a sash (of sorts) to identify them. They walk up the to the table and present their gifts. Then they dance a hora with the bride and groom.- Then there is another hora called “the Nanasi’s guests” where all the people who came to the wedding with the Nanasi dance, and then go upstairs to the dinning hall.- Next is a hora with various relatives of the bride and groom (only married people)- Lastly, the single people have to form 2 lines and hold flowers. We made an arch with the flowers for the groom to walk under as he carried his bride.- After this, the single people got to go upstairs to eat…in the back room b/c there was no more space.
The food was delicious!!! There was a lot of salad, the ‘meatballs’ that I helped make the night before, fried pieces of chicken (don’t think KFC), chips, fish, sausages, cookies, bread, ratachaturi (the PCVs call this ‘chicken jelly’ b/c it is served cold and the broth turns into a jell form around the meat), sarmali (yum! Its grape or cabbage leaves wrapped around a mixture of finely chopped pork, rice, carrots, peppers, and some other stuff), blincque (similar to something at IHOP) and much much more.
People ate and talked for a while. Then we all went downstairs to dance. Mostly people danced the hora, but I was able to dance with both my host brothers, Tata Stefan, his brother, the Nanasi, and a random guy. Then people went back upstairs to more food.
During this second time in the dinning hall, people gave money to the bride and groom. They have a pretty basket that the Nanasi walkes around with, table to table, and collects money from the guests. The guests give speeches. If you are in the front area (being a guest of the Nanasi or a married couple) they will state aloud how much money you are giving. It is quite normal to give 1,000 Moldovan Lei which is equal to about $90…however, if you work abroad, you give more, and usually in Euro. There was one couple that gave 250 Euro (they live in Italy). My American sense of privacy about money makes me uneasy about this practice of announcing the amount of money being given, however it is quite normal in Moldova. The annoying part about this is, as I stated before, Moldovans LOVE to give speeches, so you can imagine how long this takes…especially with 200 or so guests. When it was my turn, I put my money in the basket and simply said “I love you sister. Congratulations” (in Romanian of course).
Something that is very difficult to get used to, being in a foreign country, is the fish bowl syndrome. Everyone knows you. Everyone knows who you are, why you are there, where you are from, and what you ate for dinner last night. People in Moldova especially like to talk and gossip, so this is exemplified here. I know this fact, however it is quite difficult to get use to. Even before I gave my quick speech (in my lovely American accent, which people think is the cutest thing ever) I had people following me all night with their eyes. I knew that some people knew who I was, but I felt that some actually did not. I could feel their questions burning inside of them. “Who is that? Where is she from? Why is she here? What is she wearing?” etc. I was happy that I knew a lot of the family, so I could always go and sit and talk (sorta talk) to them. I frequently went outside to sit down on the patio.
One time (before the first feeding frenzie) that I went outside, this girl followed me out. I had noticed her tracing me earlier in the night, but hadn’t given it much thought. Then she came up and sat at the picnic table…right across from me. Then she said “Hi! You’re American right? Do you remember me?”
I was thinking “am I suppose to?” Apparently, she had just graduated from the high school in the village, and was at our welcoming ceremony at the village school the first day there. Her English was very good. We talked periodically through-out the evening. It was great to have her there (along with Valea’s best friend – Violeta) because they both understand English very well. Anytime I had questions about something, I knew they would be able to tell me (although I still got no answer about the towels around the elbows for family).
Next to the reception hall is a disco. Yeah, convenient right? Actually, it was a great escape from the traditional Moldovan music with keyboard sounding like an accordion…it was an escape from that, to Euro-Techno. It wasn’t that bad actually. There is no cover, and we could dance without holding hands.
As I mentioned earlier, there was a lot of alcohol purchased for the evening. LOTS!!! I did my fair share of drinking, and I must say that I love the Moldovan Champagne, Cricova, is the best in the country. I had some vodka, conac and wine too, but I loved the Cricova. Lets just say, that after about ½ way through the evening, I was having no problem talking to people. I had great conversations with the other ‘young unmarried’ people resigned to eat in the backroom. I spent the evening talking with them, dancing, and goofing around with my host brothers.
Well, it turns out that Moldovan weddings last long into the night. Well, more correctly, into the morning. I was awake at 7 am to help get stuff ready for the wedding, we were at the reception hall at 6 pm. People started arriving at 9:30 pm, but we didn’t go upstairs to eat until after 11 pm. Eventually, I ended up falling asleep at a table outside around 5:30 or 6. My host dad came over and walked me to the car so I could sleep and locked the door so I could get out if I wanted, but no-one could get in. Around 9, the wedding broke up and we eventually went home.
I slept for a few more hours, but then had to get going. I said good-bye to my PST host family and told them that I would visit them again soon, most likely in December. Then I walked the 30 minutes to the bus stop and caught a ruteria to Chisinau.
You will need to enable javascript to generate a trackback link
